Gabrielle Bernstein | Judgment Detox In Six Steps

With time and commitment to what I believe is the best way of life I want to live, I became more conscious about my habits of thoughts. I noticed that a thought could affect my mood and I started to care about what I think. I wanted to learn and understand how to accept and love unconditionally. In that process, I began to be aware of thoughts of judgment towards myself and especially the way others choose to live and think. Energetically speaking, there is no difference between judging yourself or others. But how to get rid of this habit? How to allow myself and others to be and live the way they want without letting that to me? In an early this year released book, “Judgment Detox,” Gabrielle Bernstein, a motivational speaker, spiritual teacher and #1 New York Times bestselling author shares her own insights and practices to “release the beliefs that hold us back from living a better life.”

Growing up with a very spiritual mother, Gabrielle always had a lot of faith and spiritual connection around her. “There is an ever-present energy of love within us and around us. When we live a spiritual life, we make it our priority to align with that energy.” – says Gabby about spirituality.

Judaism was Gabby’s first connection to her spiritual faith; not necessarily because of the religious elements of Judaism, but more so the culture and the spirituality. In that sense, she sees religion as one of the many ways that people can access their spiritual connection. For her, what spirituality and religion have in common is the premise that through prayer we can release our will to a higher power and learn to rely on spiritual strength.

“People may think that a spiritual practice is a lot of work. And it does require commitment – there’s a reason it’s called a practice. These tools do offer instant relief, but in order to reap lifelong benefits, you need to stick with them. What’s important to remember is that it takes a lot of work and energy and effort to judge! Judging, comparing, attacking: These things drain us. The time you put in to heal your perceptions will save you a lifetime of misery.” – comments Gabrielle.

The book, Judgment Detox consists of six-step interactive processes that are based on different spiritual principles such as A Course in Miracles, Kundalini Yoga, the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT also known as tapping), prayer, meditation and a self-reflection sharing her own experience on that topic.


“Judgment is an addiction response to deep-rooted trauma. The first trauma is the separation from love. From a spiritual perspective, choosing fear and separation over love dissociates us from our truth. We become fragmented in this state of separation and lose our connection to our inner being. We inadvertently turn our back on our inner-being and become obsessed with an outward projection of who we think we are. Feelings of guilt and sadness wash over us because deep down we know we’ve turned our back on love. But we can’t fully understand our guilt, so we do whatever we can to avoid feeling it. This is how the cycle of judgment becomes an addictive pattern. For this process to work, you must be willing to change your behavior. If you don’t believe it, you won’t receive it. Like any personal growth process, your willingness is required to make it work. However, you don’t have to figure it all out at once. The Judgment Detox is a six-step process in which each step builds on the last. It requires willingness and courage, but there is a lot of support along the way – and the rewards are massive.”


“The practice of EFT asks that you tap on specific energy meridians on your body. When these meridians are stimulated, they tell the amygdala (the part of our brain essential to feeling fear) to calm down. When the amygdala gets the message that it’s safe to relax, a major shift can occur in your emotional state. I have created specific scripts to address many of our most common trigger issues. As you tap on the specific meridians, you will be guided to address certain emotions that come up around your stress. This practice will help you heal the triggers, wounds and traumas that live underneath your judgments. This process alone can have a huge healing effect on your life. I teach EFT in the second step of the Judgment Detox so you can feel significant relief from the get-go.”


“When you pray you send an invitation to spirit to help you restore your judgmental thoughts back to love. Spirit is the voice of our right-minded self; it’s what we go to when we feel caught up in fear and judgment. When we pray to the spirit, we ask for help to undo our mind’s decision to judge. As we become aware of our judgmental thoughts, we must return to our decision-making mind and choose again as quickly as possible.”


“One simple thing you can begin to do today is to See for the First Time and as quickly as possible change the subject. Recognize that your judgment doesn’t serve you or the world and ask yourself what the compassionate response would be instead. Or be silent in the midst of other people’s judgment and gossip. Your silence is extremely powerful, and it begins the process of the Judgment Detox journey.”


“Meditation has the capacity to transform all your relationships, including your relationship with yourself. When you tune in to the energy of love through your meditation practice, you invite an invisible force of love to take over. In the presence of that love, the past can fade away and the energetic cords of judgment can dissolve. We all have energetic cords tying us to people all over the world. Sometimes we have cord connections to people we don’t even know. When you have a relationship with someone, your energy becomes connected, especially when a strong emotional event occurs between you. Energy cords can also be created when we make a contract or promise to someone, whether a business deal or a marriage or something less formal. Even when that relationship ends, the energy cord can still be intact, particularly in situations where you’re thinking negative, judgmental thoughts about that person. Your judgment creates a cord that ties you to them whether you like it or not.”


“My definition of love is the feeling of alignment, inspiration and pure joy. When we’re in that place of alignment, we are in love.”
Photography by Chloe Crespi